September 4, 2014

Why do I want to tell you the story of Starfollower37?  It’s simple really.  She has a perspective of getting into this wonderful lifestyle that I did not have and knew almost nothing about.  She has given me a unique understanding of a very different way a woman can enter our lifestyle.

I want to tell her story because I want to hear from other women out there that may be considering this rather radical approach to finding happiness by following their own star as well as hearing from those of you who already have, or from the men in their lives that have been affected by their decision.

My only goal from Day One has been to try and help real people get truthful non biased information about our lifestyle.

Almost every day I get an email from someone that presents an issue I never considered before or is way outside my knowledge base.  I answer every single one with the truth.  Sometimes all I can do is listen and give my perspective as just a woman, not a hotwife.

Sometimes asking questions and listening, gives men at least some insight to the issue.  Sometimes that is enough.  Sometimes it’s not, but at least I tried to help.

What’s so great about the Starfollower37 story is that I can totally relate.  We could almost be twin sisters by the lives we were leading prior to making the leap.

We were both ignored by our husband’s, living in a sexless marriage.  I was considering an affair, when my husband suddenly became aware of my existence in his life.

She took a different route and smacked her husband right in the face by becoming a totally different woman in the space of a few days.  I want you to hear her story.  It’s compelling!

I received my first missive from her in mid June.  She identified herself to me at the time as Starfollower37.  I was instantly intrigued by her name.  Once I read her email, I knew she was going to impact my own personal life if she was for real, because not only was she local to me being a Tampa chick, she also could basically read my mind which was quite disconcerting. 

She found my Tumblr blog first.  She told me she was not a hotwife, but was having an affair with a very “enlightened” older man who suggested that if she was going to be following her own star, she needed experience with men and sex, that she did not currently have. 

He suggested that she do some research on line about the hotwife lifestyle.  She said she did that and found my blog.  Initially she contacted me because she was more curious about my career as a prostitute than as a hotwife. 

Her thinking at that time was if her friend wanted her to get experience with men and sex, why not get paid for it? 

I was very skeptical of the motive of her friend.  We spent several back and forth emails over two weeks before I was convinced he really was a very good man that was trying to help her find her way, instead of being a predator that was simply using her.  In the end she convinced me.  That’s where her story begins.



September 5, 2015

I have a new personal friend in Tampa.  She doesn’t want me to use her name but when I asked for her permission to tell her story she said I could use Starfollower37 as her identification.  She is 37 years old.  I can tell you that much.

The reason I am using her code name is because we are collaborating on a way for me to tell her complete story which when finished will be published one segment at a time as a tab on my website called Starfollower37. 

Her story is compelling to me because I have been used to hearing from both men and women where the husband is the one that wants his wife to open up her end of the marriage.

The more time I spent with her, the more drawn in to her story I became.  I finally decided her story was too good not to tell because I can take my time and tell the complete story on my website.  It is relevant, truthful, and most interesting of all to me, was the family dynamics involved.

The main reason we are using her code name is because I am going to tell her husband’s side of the story from her perspective.  She has given me permission to tell their story.  He has not.  I have already learned not to use certain real information without permission from the real person involved. 

In this case, the real person involved is not going to make a fuss, but having worked for a bunch of lawyers for 12 years has given me lots of access to free advice.  That’s why she is going to be Starfollower37 instead of Tammy from Tampa or Frieda from Florida.

Yes this post is a shameless teaser because I want you all to understand this is going to be a pretty radical departure from the type of stuff I usually post.

Starfollower37 did not become a hotwife in the usual way.  She had no idea when she began her journey she would end up as a hotwife.  She was a very unhappily married woman whose husband was ignoring her existence like Michael was ignoring mine.

One morning she woke up and decided she was tired of being miserable, tired of being lonely, and tired of being treated as a family servant.

She decided to start following her own star.  She stopped ignoring the advances of other men.  She stopped saying “No.”

“Alexis there were a dozen men that wanted to have sex with me and one that didn’t!  What’s wrong with that picture?”  She asked me one day at Jill’s bar.  I was wondering if she got that from me.  I could relate to her totally. 

She began an affair with a very enlightened man who, to his credit, didn’t want to just take from her.  He became her mentor and advisor.  Up until that point in her 37th year she had only had sex with one man in her life and she married him. 

Her new friend encouraged her to expand her horizons with other men to gain experience with both men and sex, so that she would know if following her own star would ultimately lead to her happiness or destroy her marriage, which was a cost she was prepared to pay.

This is going to be a different perspective for most of you.  It’s why I want you to read her story once I get it finished.


September 5, 2015

Starfollower37 moved to Tampa, last year when her husband took a job for a multinational construction company.  The majority of their contracts are in the United Arab Emirates where they are currently managing five projects.

Her husband is in upper middle management.  Although his regional office is located in Tampa he took the job with the understanding that for the foreseeable future he would be commuting to the UAE on a regular basis. 

They have a seventeen year old son who is a gifted baseball player.  He was not at all happy at the prospect of being uprooted during the summer between his sophomore and junior year of high school. 

The transition was made easier by the fact that his baseball coach in Atlanta notified several high schools in Tampa of his impending relocation he was actually actively recruited by a few of them. 

She said that no illegal offers were made but his parents eased his pain by letting him pick the school with the best baseball program and then moved into that district. 

That solved the son’s issues but it did nothing to improve his mothers quality of life issues which were marital issues, not location issues.  They were made worse because  she was uprooted from the few friends she had in Atlanta. 

Within just a few months of relocating to Tampa, her husband was notified that he and another manager would rotate back and forth to the UAE on a monthly basis.  That meant that he would be in the UAE for a month then home for a month then back to the UAE. 

He would be spending half the year away from home.  She wondered at the time that it could be a blessing in disguise if absence made the heart grow fonder. 

It didn’t happen.  During his month in Tampa he got the first week back as comp time.  They joined a country club and he spent almost every day of his week off playing golf, and then spent the next three weeks in his office before returning for another month to the UAE.


September 6, 2015

Starfollower37 never worked outside the home during their marriage.  Her husband is eight years older and was already established in business when the met.  They married in the spring and she became pregnant a month later.  She was a virgin.  She was twenty years old. 

By the time she was thirty five she felt like she was fifty.  She is a beautiful sexy woman that had always taken care of herself.  She said that she was within five pounds of her weight when they married. 

Her wakeup call came during her son’s first baseball game she attended in Tampa.  The third base coach of her son’s team saw her sitting in the stands and rarely took his eyes off her during the game.   

He had no idea who she was but was unabashedly flirting with her throughout the game.  He didn’t look to be much older than her son but he was a coach so he was probably in his twenties.  She loved the attention. 

She admitted that she flirted back even though she knew it was leading her nowhere.  After the game when the coach saw her talking to her son, he came over and introduced himself.  It was evident to her that he had high hopes.  She said the way he was looking at her made her feel naked and vulnerable. 

Instead of that making her feel uncomfortable, it turned her on in a way she didn’t understand.  Although nothing was going to happen, the seed was planted. 

There were men out there that desired her even if they were 10-12 years younger than she was.  She didn’t have to settle for living in an emotional and sexual vacuum. 

The following day she joined the YMCA near their home.  It took her 15 years to gain those five pounds but now she was motivated.  She set her first goal at eliminating those extra five pounds. 

Within a month the five pounds were gone and she had a perfectly flat stomach once again.  If her husband noticed, he said nothing.  The side benefit of joining the Y was the other men that were noticing her.  Several men tried to catch her interest.

She wasn’t ready for several reasons.  She wanted to look her best.  She wanted to gain confidence.  She was insecure.  There was also a huge societal roadblock in her way.  She was a married woman that had remained monogamous to her husband.

On the other hand, there was one man there that particularly interested her although she wasn’t sure why at first.  She admitted to me that it may have been because he was the only one that had not tried to talk to her, and that made her curious, because he was paying attention to what she was doing but in a subtle way.


His name is Chris.  She knew his name because she discovered that he was a regular and he knew many of the other members that used the gym during the day because that is when a lot of women use the gym as well. 

That explained why some of the women showed up looking like they were going out on a date or were on their way home from one.  She learned that the gym at the YMCA is a way for women to meet men without going to a bar in the middle of the day when the kids are in school and the husband is at work.  Who knew?

At 1:30 on a Friday afternoon they ended up both leaving the building at the same time and he finally spoke to her.

“You are such a beautiful woman.  I hope someday you find a reason to smile.  My name is Chris by the way.  It’s short for Christopher, not Christine.”  He said.  She laughed at what he said about his name. 

He told her it was the first time he had ever seen her smile in the month and a half he had seen her at the gym the same three days a week there were both there. 

That surprised her.  Not because of what he said, but because he noticed.  It made her even more curious about him and they ended up chatting in the parking lot over nothing for fifteen minutes or so. 

She didn’t run him off and he didn’t leave.  He told her later that after fifteen minutes chatting in the parking lot he was cautiously optimistic that she wouldn’t shoot him down if he offered to buy her a drink.

She told me that she wanted to accept his offer but needed to get home and change to attend her son’s baseball game.  Then she said she heard the words come out of her mouth before she ever had the thought in her mind.  She asked if she could have a rain check.